31 Day Blog Challenge: What Am I Afraid Of?

Hmmm I feel like this post could go a few different ways. I could post a list of the random little things that I’m afraid of (and honestly, that wouldn’t be a long list, I don’t exactly scare easily), or I could talk about my “biggest” fears. But every time I thing about it, my “biggest” fear doesn’t really seem that big. I mean, some people are afraid of dying (while I don’t want to die, I’m not afraid to do it), some are afraid of losing their loved ones (I’ve had enough people close to me die to know that it sucks big time, but I’ve gotten through it every time), some people are afraid of being lost either literally or figuratively (I’m pretty confident in my ability to find my way to where ever I’m going if I were to literally get lost. Plus that’s just a fun adventure. Figuratively, I’ve never really known where I’m going in life, and I’m pretty much ok with that).

Those are just some things that actually seem “big” and “important”, ya know? My biggest fear just seems silly in comparison. I’m afraid of small spaces and “not being able to get away”. They kinda go hand in hand I suppose. Because if I was ever stuck in a small space, I probably wouldn’t be able to get away. So being trapped in a pile of rubble or something like that would literally be the worst thing in the world for me. I’ve legit been on the verge of a panic attach when being playfully held down and tickled. I can’t even wear hoodies to bed because they are too confining. I always have to feel like I can get away and that I’m not trapped.

One year when I was a kid, I went to spelunking camp with some of my friends. So we spent a whole week exploring in caves. Holy cow that was one of the most stressful weeks of my life haha. I mean, I did have fun, but being underground, not being able to see the sky, crawling through tiny spaces. *shudder* I’m never doing that again!

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